Wacky and Wonderful Titles for Motion 312!

March 23, 2012   **Updated March 29, 2012**

We recently invited supporters to name Motion 312, Stephen Woodworth’s attempt to gain rights for fetuses. (For all the background, see our counter arguments, our sample letter to send to your MP, and don’t forget to sign our petition!)

We received dozens of delightful suggestions, ranging from sarcastic to serious, wacky to weighty, naughty to nasty, and pithy to… prolonged, shall we say!

Thanks to everyone who submitted a title, and also thanks to Dammit Janet! for publicizing the campaign.

We started out by using the sarcastic title “Women Can’t Be Trusted” in our official correspondence and documents on the issue, because that is a good representation of what the motion really means in the minds of anti-choicers. But we’re gonna change it up!  We’ll select some of the titles we like the best (with your help!) and then over the coming months, keep switching around the titles in our existing and future documents and posts.  We might confuse a few folks, but one thing that’ll come through loud and clear is that there’s an attack on women underway in this country and we won’t stand for it!!

We hereby present the submissions for your enjoyment.  Let us know your favourites, or give us more and we’ll add them to this list. (Email them to info@arcc-cdac.ca or post them on our Facebook page.)

Also, clever titles in French are needed and welcome! See our French titles so far here.  

  1. Remove Women’s Autonomy
  2. Repeal Women’s Rights
  3. Make Pregnant Women 3rd Class Citizens
  4. Are Women Human?
  5. Women Are Incubators
  6. Define Women as Incubators
  7. Women Are Not Human Beings
  8. Women Can’t Be Trusted Motion
  9. Little Toes are People Too Motion
  10. Middle-aged WASP Men Know What’s Best Motion
  11. I Know Nothing About Medicine or Biology But I’m Not Going To Let That Keep Me From Forcing My Opinions On Others Motion
  12. When does a Woman Become a Human Being Motion
  13. Which came first ‘The Woman or the Egg’ Motion
  14. Women Aren’t Persons Unless Childbearing Motion
  15. Motion to Regress and Oppress
  16. Kanada’s Kinder, Küche, Kirche Motion
  17. Hidden Abortion Agenda Motion or HAAM
  18. The Handmaid’s Tale Motion
  19. The *Catholic Sharia* Pregnancy Control Motion
  20. The Coathanger of White Male Prominence Motion
  21. The “Everything I Know About Being Pregnant I Learned From Watching TLC” Motion
  22. The Long Arm of My Schlong Motion
  23. The Vagina Registry
  24. The Womb Registry
  25. Uterrorist Motion
  26. A Womb With a View Motion
  27. Womb Mates Motion
  28. Public Wombs Board Motion
  29. The XXLandlordXX Tenant Motion
  30. No Womb for Wimin’s Rights Motion
  31. Make Womb for ME! Motion
  32. No Womb of My Own Motion
  33. Free Womb and Board Motion
  34. The “Lets make sure that women do what the government wants and not what their human rights dictate” motion
  35. “Choices? Women aren’t capable of those” Motion
  36. Freedom is when the government decides what you Can and Cant do with your body Motion
  37. No Choice for Pro Choicers Motion
  38. The dodging a speeding sperm is futile motion
  39. Mitochondrial Protection Motion
  40. Vagina Welfare and Womb Protection Motion
  41. Family Planning and Ejaculation Authority Motion
  42. The ‘Oh Shit, Not This Again’ Motion
  43. The ‘Pathetic Backbencher Stomps His Little Feet’ motion
  44. The Women Are Public Incubators motion
  45. Woodworth’s Wank
  46. Dicks Rule Vaginas Motion
  47. The Vagina Intrusion Motion
  48. The Foetuses Are Persons; Women and Children Are NOT Motion
  49. A Motion to Nurture Treasured In-Utero Foetuses and Empower Men (Short title: “ANTIFEM”)
  50. The Supremacy of the Sperm Motion
  51. Theocrats Rule Women Drool Motion
  52. Wombless Humans are Human Motion
  53. A Womban isn’t Human Motion
  54. Socon’s Dicked-Up Bowel Motion
  55. Legitimating the Loco Motion
  56. Wombless Woodworth Woos Willy Worshipping Whackos Motion
  57. Parochial Patriarchal Priesthoods for Pregnancy as Public Punishment Motion
  58. Womb Wedgie Motion
  59. My Wood is Worth more than your Womb Motion
  60. Traumatized by the Vagina Monologues Motion
  61. Mansplaining Motherhood, Murder and Male Magisterium Motion
  62. The Rapist Choice Motion (letting rapists choose the mothers of their children)
  63. The Oktober(fetus)fest motion
  64. The “Woody’s Not Worth It” Motion
  65. Woodie’s Zygote and Pony Show
  66. The ‘If a Fetus is a Person Then a Woman Isn’t’ Motion
  67. Nicolae Ceausescu Memorial Motion
  68. The “Make Womb for Daddy” motion
  69. Fuck Women
  70. I fertilized your egg so I know what pregnancy is
  71. Sunnyside up or Overbearing
  72. To womb or not to womb…that is the fetal decision
  73. Who needs critical thinking skills when a Man can do it for me
  74. Womb needs rights anyway?
  75. Womb dunnit Motion
  76. I cannot get a woman so I will get a womb instead
  77. Wombs for Woodworth
  78. The “Men Who Stare At Zygotes” Motion
  79. The Getting His Wood’s Worth Motion
  80. “More Foul-smelling Shit from the Rotting Mouth of Yet Another Irrelevant Twit” Motion
  81. “Conservative Christian Men Obsessed w. Women’s Bodies” Motion
  82. “Fuck the Women. Save the Fetus Conservatives Philosophy” Motion
  83. “Fetus Fetishists’ Fake Empathy for Fetuses” Motion
  84. “Fetus Fetishists’ Fomenting Fury Against Feminists” Motion
  85. “Fetus Fetishists Fury Against Women’s Right to Informed Consent”
  86. “Conservative Christian Men Deeply Envious of Women’s Ability to Become Pregnant” Motion
  87. “Another Attempt to Strip Rights from Canadian Women” Motion
  88. “Conservatives’ Next Step to Make Abortion Illegal in Canada” Motion
  89. “We Hate Canadian Women & they Deserve to Suffer” Motion
  90. Women’s Autonomy Removed (WAR!)
  91. Women Get Pregnant All By Themselves Motion
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